Do u agree with this girls an boys? lol?

DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS

40-ish - 49

Adventurous - Slept with everyone

Athletic - No ****

Average looking - Ugly

Beautiful - Pathological liar

Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills

Emotionally secure - On medication

Feminist - Fat

Free spirit - Junkie

Friendship first - Former very *friendly* person

Fun - Annoying

New Age - Body hair in the wrong places

Open-minded - Desperate

Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing

Passionate - Sloppy drunk

Professional - *****

Voluptuous - Very Fat

Large frame - Hugely Fat

Wants Soul mate - Stalker

WOMEN'S ENGLISH

1. Yes = No

2. No = Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want

5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry

6. We need to talk = you're in trouble

7. Sure, go ahead = you better not

8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron!

10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH

1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = let's have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?

7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you

8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you

9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you

10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you

11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay

And finally.....

A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle.

For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features.

However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.

Do u agree with this girls an boys? lol?

Girls rulezz..........Lol.

@twinkle- lol.

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bah it just entertainment

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hahahhahah

very clever

star

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That's pretty damn funny!

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HAHAH...very funny

Joe, a college student, was taking a course in ornithology, the study of birds. The night before the biggest test of the semester, Joe spent all night studying. He had the textbook nearly memorized. He knew his class notes backward and forward. Joe was ready.

The morning of the test, Joe entered the auditorium and took a seat in the front row. On the table in the front was a row of ten stuffed birds. Each bird had a sack covering its body, and only the legs were showing. When class started, the professor announced that the students were to identify each bird by looking at its legs and give its common name, species, habitat, mating habits, etc.

Joe looked at each of the birds' legs. They all looked the same to him. He started to get angry. He had stayed up all night studying for this test and now he had to identify birds by their LEGS? The more he thought about the situation, the angrier he got.

Finally he reached his boiling point. He stood up, marched up to the professor's desk, crumpled up his exam paper and threw it on the desk. "What a ridiculous test!" he told the prof. "How could anyone tell the difference between these birds by looking at their legs? This exam is the biggest rip-off I've ever seen!"

With that, Joe turned and stormed toward the exit. The professor was a bit shocked, and it took him a moment to regain his composure. Then, just as Joe was about to walk out the door, the prof shouted out, "Wait a minute, young man, what's your name?"

Joe turned around, pulled up his pant legs and hollered, "You tell me, prof! You tell me!"

CHeeRIoS

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HAHA This is 100% True

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Sounds about right to me.

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how very true on all counts lol

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LOL!!!!

by the way, sex isn't the onl thing on a mans mind!= I want to have sex right now.

Do u agree with this girls an boys? lol?

yes i do agree with all of these an had a good laugh reading them

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All except the personal ads are 100% true

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Very funny and some of the dictionary is very true for some men and women.

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lol haha something to keep in mind i guess: )

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hahahahahaha

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lol...thanks for the chuckel....you get a star!

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lol good one

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I thought yes meant yes, no meant maybe and maybe meant yes!!lol

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haha nicee :)

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lol haha

Do u agree with this girls an boys? lol?

wow, its crazy how true that last part was, and number 11 on the mens list, as well as the feminist and fun defenition for women.

Do u agree with this girls an boys? lol?

I needed that thank you soooooo much

xoxoxox and ur right.

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OMG..ha ha...that so funny..everyones looking at me....*minimises page*